And the annual post comes again.
My October post is probably one of my favorite pieces of writing I do every year. Because without fail, I laugh and cry every time I write it.
I use my birthday month every year, as not only a goal setting month, but a month to think back on things. It's seriously a really good exercise thinking about all of the positive and negative things that ensue over the short span of 365 days.
As such...
Year 25, I have to say, you were unquestionably my best year yet.
I started 25 by meeting my best friend in Hong Kong while I was doing my visa run. Juliana quickly made the decision to tag along, and thankfully so. I remember saying to Julz: "it's funny, we're meeting up in Hong Kong, of all places, for the first time in months." I look forward to meeting this girl all over the world in the years to come.
I discovered a city I'd like to call home, at least for a short time. Hong Kong was amazing and we both loved it...so much so that Juliana missed her flight back to Singapore (where she was living and studying at that time.)
I celebrated 25 on the worlds highest rooftop, at some starwars themed Halloween party, that quickly got really weird. We made our way to the island and back to our hotel around 7am with dead phones that were left uncharged and thus, with alarms that didn't go off and thus, a morning running around like idiots trying to rally out of our hotel room so that I could at least get back to Shanghai. Juliana spent the day at the airport...
I travelled a bunch in my 25th year.
I saw Hong Kong.
I spent 3 weeks wandering Indonesia, a totally stunning country I can't wait to go back to, with some good company this time around, I hope.
I went to Thailand and had a good balance of peace and partying.
I went to Singapore and had one of my favorite days with a girl who has come to be one of my closest friends.
I went to Taiwan and was stunned by its beauty.
I travelled Mainland China, travelling that opened my eyes to the sheer size and diversity of this crazy country I have decided to call home for a couple more years.
I made my way back to Canada and spent sometime with a familiar stranger in Vancouver and a week at home with some of the best people.
I collected a decent amount of stamps on my passport and acquired a whole new love for South East Asia. A lot of solo travelling also meant a lot of reading, and thinking, and random friends and encounters and most importantly, a ton of new knowledge.
Living here meant new friendships too.
I have met some incredible people who have turned into family.
I've watched people come and go, and realized the hardships that come with living in a transient place.
I have had some crazy nights, watched sunsets and sunrises on the bund, and pieced evenings together over massages and pedicures, too many times.
I've eaten enough baos, drank [too many] old fashions, and developed an addiction for cola hi-chews.
Climbed rooftops, spent afternoons on yongkang, and wandered through some of the best art galleries and museums.
I've seen some incredible sporting events, bought my fair share of sneakers and seen some pretty cool live acts.
Mom & dad visited China for the first time ever and left feeling a little unsettled after being robbed in Beijing (lol) and realizing I was pretty serious about staying here. I loved having them here and I loved seeing the Great Wall with them.
The coffee shop I'm writing at right now is the same one where I sent them off and every time I come here a sense of nostalgia comes over me.
My dad doesn't cry but instead he does this thing where he kisses my forehead and then hugs me and taps my back a few times. I know those taps are almost like tears for him- one's where he's saying: be good, take care and come home soon- i love you.
My mom, though she always tries not to cry, always fails and lets the waterworks turn on. I promised her I would visit before the summer was up and didn't live up to that promise. Christmas can't come soon enough.
My mom and dad have shown an endless amount of support and love, though not always agreeing with all my decisions, over the past year or so. I try to make all my decisions with this in mind: "Your parents always want the best for you, but what they want for you isn't always the best thing for you." I always take their advice and directions, but I never lose sense of what I want.
The apartment I came to call home for the last year is currently being packed up...sorta. The sofa housed so many random people from all over the world, and hopefully my next sofa can do the same.
I sort of adopted a dog and became a surrogate mother, thanks CHOW.
Twenty Five- my last attempt at corporate. I failed and thankfully so.
Today I find myself overtiming every single day and loving every second of it.
I'm having a few days of break before I am thrown into my first ever fashion week.
At work I develop digital campaigns, build stores, work with designers and write for a living. I am seriously in my dream job, a dream of a job that comes with many hurdles, but who said that anything was easy.
A friend I met this year said to me: "you're young, you should be doing something younger." He has no clue how hard those words resonated with me.
I am taking my studies a lot more seriously and my Mandarin has improved tenfolds these last few months and I hope to not rely on translations at all this time next year.
Twenty Five has been one consistent year of change and thinking about all of this today, makes me feel so lucky.
Though a year of change, some things remained. I realized that no matter how far away I may be, my best friendships won't be challenged. I've stayed well connected with my closest friends and still talk to most of them on a regular basis.
One of my favorite memories from this year was the exchange of love and tears that ensued when I made a impromptu trip home for one of best friends wedding days. Thinking about that moment and that day makes me so happy and so excited to see her in a few months.
One thing that remains much the same is that I miss my family and friends and that's all inevitable. Not seeing Alex & Ana and missing birthdays and hockey games and Christmas concerts hasn't exactly been easy, but it's a part of this choice of living away from loved ones. One thing that distance does do is remind you of just how important family and friends are. It makes you try harder to preserve relationships with some of the most important people.
After all,
Happiness is only real when it is shared.
Collecting pieces and reliving memories makes me realize that so much has happened over the past year and that I have so much to be grateful for.
26:
I'm going to simplify the goal setting this year.
1) For the sake of happiness: Presence
2) For the sake of success: Design
3) For the sake of intuition: New York
bonus. 4) For the sake of love: Bravery
It's almost exactly a year from the day I wrote this post last year.
The leaves are falling, and the air in the city hasn't been this good in forever. It's so beautiful out.
I don't know what it is about October but it's really the best combination of all things.
The weather, wardrobe changes, the way people cling onto patios for just a few more weeks to enjoy coffee and conversation for just a little longer.
I want to wake up earlier to live a little more of it every day.
For some reason I feel like I fall much deeper into my books, and my projects.
Into people and into experiences.
I'm more aware, but also more vulnerable.
Generally, I'm just more content.
It's not a new feeling, it's a reoccurring one and I look forward to it so much more every single year.
Maybe the growing numbers that represent my growing years have something to do with this.
Whatever it is, I don't want it to stop.
The funny thing about time is that it doesn't stop, it doesn't slow down, it just goes.
I think the key is figuring out how to go with it and not against it.
There is an ambiguity to the way life unfolds and if you embrace it, life tastes fucking DELICIOUS
....this is life: delicious ambiguity.
I love October, because from beginning to end, it's beautiful.
