At home, it’s a beautiful time of
year. Though bittersweet knowing that winter is just around the corner, the
changing colors and hues make for one good looking city.
Here, it’s finally cooling off. The
breeze is just that, a breath of fresh air, in comparison to the unbearable
humidity that the summer months bring.
No matter where I am, I love October because from beginning
to end, it’s beautiful.
As a kid I loved October because it meant
taking pictures in leaf piles, carving pumpkins, making scarecrows with my dad,
celebrating my birthday, and of course, celebrating Halloween. The school year
was still fresh and thus novel; new friendships were being formed. It wasn’t
too cold, and whyte ave was filled with coffee drinkers, strolling down, window
shopping and appreciating the last few weeks of outdoor activities. Bike rides
and walks in the river valley were most enjoyable; the Edmonton river valley
never looks more beautiful.
Things remain much the same, with a few tweaks here and there. I look forward to seeing
my niece and nephew in their Halloween costumes. I look forward to
transitioning my wardrobe. Reading the Globe and Mail outside on a crisp
and sunny Sunday, or sharing a cinnamon bun from Sugarbowl with endless pours
of drip coffee (those I really miss). I look forward to birthday dinners with my best girlfriends;
wine and pasta usually. I look forward to having those kiddos blow out my
candles over and over and over again.
I know that this October will be a
little different than most others.
I’m away and alone, my best friends
aren’t here, I don’t get to take those kiddos out trick or treating and there’s
no cake and candles with my family. Of course these are things I will miss.
Having said all this, I’m looking
forward to what I like to call my annual goal setting month. Instead of having new years resolutions, that I rarely keep, I make real goals.
Last October I made 3 goals:
·
Move abroad before the year is up.
·
Change anything that doesn’t make you happy.
·
Read and travel a whole lot.
Twenty-four was a good year. A scary
year. A year of good times and bad. Fun times and sad. Mostly, a year of
significant change.
I made some really difficult
decisions, decisions that still tug at my heartstrings. However, it was a year
of empowerment.
I thought long and hard about who I
was, who I wanted to be and what I needed to do to get there. I started a new
job, a job I enjoyed, but promised myself would only be
temporary.
Jason and I had done some really good
travelling. We went to Hawaii and to Seattle and Vancouver, what were our
favorite spots. We went dog sledding, something we’d always talked about doing.
I went up to the mountains and dusted off the snowboard for some spectacular
powder sessions. I went on my first solo vacation. I spontaneously went to
California. I took countless road trips to Calgary. I went on a wicked girls
trip to Tofino. I made my way to China.
Twenty-four was the first time I was
single in a very long time. It was something new, it’s still something new. I’m
extremely grateful for those seven years and would never change them in a
million years. Sometimes people grow together, and sometimes people grow apart.
I spent much time in bookstores and
turned to a lot of self-help books. I took a liking to Bloomberg, fast company,
Psychologytoday, Fortune, New York Times columns and countless blogs. I discovered brainpickings.
I tried to read some fiction…mostly unsuccessful on that end. I’m working on
it.
I discovered a new love for yoga. I
mastered positions I once thought impossible. I found peace and comfort in what
were once the most uncomfortable and challenging positions. I understand yoga
addictions better now.
I went on some good and bad dates. I
met some VERY interesting people that have all left some sort of lasting
impression on me. I built new friendships, I strengthened old ones.
24 was also a year of recognition. A
year of appreciation and a year of discovering. A year where self-worth became
an ever prominent notion. To date, it was my most important character-building
year. It was not a year for love or relationships. It was a selfish year. I did
what I wanted to do without hesitation, fear or guilt.
Ana turned 4 and Alex turned 7
(HOW?!). We faced some tough losses as a family. Mom and dad spent a month in
Vietnam and saw Asia together for the first time. Some of my friends moved away, some moved back home. Some got
engaged, others bought homes, others married. Some defended their thesis,
others were well on their way to becoming lawyers.
Everyone and everything was changing
so much. Evolving so much.
October makes me think of these
changes. It gives me a month to reminisce. A time to think about how much
things can change in 365 days. A time for gratitude. Above all, a time to think
about goals, objectives, accomplishments and short comings.
25:
- Stop worrying, stop pushing people away, be present and be open to vulnerability.
- Have the courage to execute, and the ability to push your pride aside should things not work out according to plan.
- Take your pleasures seriously and feed your hunger.
25. May you be as eye-opening, exciting, spontaneous and lovely.
I'm living my last few days of 24, and I'm living the life I always imagined I would be living. Ahh yes, I can hear you all saying it, she's still so young. I am young! But time is of the essence. It doesn't come and go, it just goes.
It's 2am. Common theme in my life and I can't sleep. I have an enormous mug of caffeinated green tea and a stack of reading material by my side, ensuring that tonight be one I regret in the morning. I can't help it, I just like to do this to myself. It's all a bit easier with Bon Iver ringing in the back (I've really been on a Bon Iver kick as of late). I so much enjoy these moments of peace.
So much to do before the month is up. That's life here in general; a new environment calls for constant to-do lists.
October is much the same. A
transitioning wardrobe, Hockey Night In Canada (thought in the morning and not
evening), coffees and outdoor strolls. An online version of the Globe and Mail
on a starbucks patio, and dinner and wine with new people and new friends. Change
is good and change is healthy.
October 27 won’t be the same this
year, sure. I especially feel heavy hearted thinking about my munchkins yelling
Aunty across the halls of the house. I miss it and I miss them. Yet, there’s no
place I would rather be right now.
This is so right.
I love October because from beginning
to end, it’s beautiful.
