So, I'm rereading 'The Power of Now' by Eckhart Tolle. Though I initially thought this was an excellent read, this time it's a little different (this seems to be a reoccurring theme when rereading books- you seriously can miss so much the first time around). It's about this concept of presence which I have been [trying to] practicing a lot in the past couple of months....and maybe I've been doing it wrong?
Besides the point...
Here's some food for thought:
"Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy. This will miraculously transform your whole life."
Sometimes we spend so much time and energy thinking about the future, and thinking about the past that we literally lose sight of the now.
I do this. I worry sometimes about the potential threats in my future by choosing to stay in China. Other times, I look at photos and letters of my past and cling to moments, artifacts and people that are long gone and I spend days reliving 2012, instead of living 2014.
What fucks people up is how much they think.
I especially know this about myself. I especially recognize this when reading this book.
“Thinking and consciousness are not synonymous. Thinking is only a small aspect of consciousness. Thought cannot exist without consciousness, but consciousness does not need thought.”
- - - - - - - -
'Everything happens for a reason.'
The new job.
Let me begin with the bad first. I'm terribly exhausted, all the time.
I wake up between 5am and 6am every single morning and thus I have been passing out the moment I walk into my house. As such, I have been a little absent with my friends here and at home, and my family. This weekend was the first weekend out in a while and it was a breath of fresh air.
Doing language classes in the morning, followed by 8-12 hour days can be mega exhausting.
...and that's about it, I'm tired. It's a new schedule and it's only a matter of time until I get accustomed to it.
The good:
I wake up and think about work, at work I'm consumed and when I leave, I don't leave my work. I am constantly working and the best thing of all, it doesn't feel like work because it doesn't feel boring and mundane and life sucking. I am constantly thinking about what kind of digital campaign we should launch, what kind of lookbook we should stage for SS15, what our new concept store will have, what kind of collaborations we should be doing, what kind of content we should be pushing etc.
It's like this, I'll be on the subway home and I'll hear a word on my playlist or in my book and I'll light up and scramble for a note pad to write the word down. Two weeks ago that word, or I guess in this case quote, was: "I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious." This quote has played an increasingly important role in my office and in my role the last couple of weeks.
Last week I raced from the bathroom to my desk to get a thought out on paper before I forgot it. I'm sure my colleagues think I'm a huge weirdo...but we're all pretty fucking weird.
I constantly feel like this is all too good to be true.
Work is great, really great.
This opportunity...it was blissful disruption.
"Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it."There have been numerous events in my life where I thought to myself, 'everything happens for a reason'. This, more so than any other experience, speaks to that theory. Instead of denying anything, instead of thinking too much, instead of neglecting changes- just go with it. To go with it, to accept it like it was chosen for you, to take the moment and to embrace it, might be the best thing you could ever do for yourself.
None of this was part of the plan...you know Asia (like longterm Asia). But who the fuck said life was a plan?
Life is a series of experiences, opportunities and goals. You can have those, and you should always have those, but to have a plan as to how they should unravel, is to deny yourself a sense of happiness and pleasure. Above all, life is about living.
“All negativity is caused by an accumulation of psychological time and denial of the present. Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry—all forms of fear—are caused by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence.”Today, I am here. I am exactly where I am suppose to be and NOW is all there ever is.
"leave life alone. let it be."
I started 'The Power of Now' about 6 days ago after having a, what we like to call here, 'a China day.' I was, in what felt like, the middle of no where. A city in China where consumerism and wealth accumulation have taken off at a pace that is undefinable; we just opened a new store there. Several factors made for a shitty day, long hours, a creepy hotel room, travelling all day, leaving the office with a huge assignment and a fever, and to top it off, a lack of caffeine. I literally laid in bed and thought:
"WHAT AM I DOING? WHY AM I HERE? I MISS HOME. I MISS MY FAMILY. I MISS MY FRIENDS. MY COLLEAGUES BARELY UNDERSTAND A WORD I AM TRYING TO CONVEY.
CAN I DO THIS- CAN I REALLY DO THIS, LONG TERM?"
These feelings come up when we are pushed really far out of our comfort zones...and ugh, sometimes they suck so much.
Needless to say, the feelings were gone when the store was all ready and I was on my way back into Shanghai.
This moment made me pull for Tolle's book that I picked up on the street a couple weeks ago (BOOTLEG BOOKS ARE THE BEST THING EVERRRR!)
Rereading Tolle, I have really been trying to shake off any negativity, any thoughts of the past, any hesitations of the future, because everything is unfolding as it should be and I am learning to trust the timing of my life, even though, in some circumstances, I wish timing was better.
“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation, but you thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking.”Sometimes, disruptions aren't disruptions at all, quite the opposite.
SERENDIPITY OVER CHOREOGRAPHY, ALWAYS.
There are opportunities and people that come into your life, and instead of asking why, or focusing on the negative, embrace the moment and embrace everything it has to offer. You might find yourself somewhere you never expected to find yourself...and there's a real sense of excitement and happiness in that.
Leave life alone. Let it be.
Focus on all the good around you, and most importantly, realize that the present moment is all you will ever have.
